The Myth, The Man
by Sushi4Brains
Summary: Musings on the life and times of my favorite ninja: Hatake Kakashi


Musings on the life and times of one of my favorite ninja. Work Text:

How well we know the story – Hatake Kakashi, prodigy, product of tragedy. His father's lifeless body he discovered – a grief too weighty for his narrow shoulders, transformed him into a rule abiding parody of a human.

Hatake Sakumo, legend, father … gone.

An empty shell, dusty ledgers of clan secrets left for the son he loved and died for to remove shame's stain.

Emotions he now hid behind book learning … love, carefully folded up, locked away … relegated to a dark corner of his heart.

His first assignment as a jounin, as leader of a team almost as inexperienced as he – the staunch refusal to abandon the mission that a comrade's life he might spare and suddenly, the rules he'd clung to and trusted in gave way beneath him. A crybaby rival, one not worthy of his attention … Uchiha Obito, freely surrendered his life in exchange for his, bequeathing to him a gift more precious than the rarest of gems.

Rin Nohara, another bright flickering light which danced around him, gave him purpose to live on, to fulfill his promise – she too sacrificed her life to save her village – his hand through her chest, an accident and her light faded from before his eyes. Rin, his last link to simpler times, to joy unspoken, she was now another memory to haunt his dreams by night; one more weight added to the wheelbarrow of guilt he pushed around each day.

His sensei, now the Yondaime Hokage, assigned him to ANBU's ranks, his intention to keep Kakashi close, to draw him back into the light of life, even as soul sucking missions fed the darkness in his heart. One horror-filled night, a rampaging demon stole away the annoying brightness he loved.

And then Sensei/Yondaime was gone.

Naturally, the darkness in his heart grew, sealing off the desire for a continued existence; though the putrescent stench of gloom and misery radiating from him was a sweet smelling savor to Danzo Shimura, who enticed him to abandon all pretense and embrace Konoha's notorious Foundation.

But grace … favor unmerited, would not have it so.

Fate intervened, taking on the bodily forms of Maito Gai, Asuma Sarutobi and Kurenai Yuuhi - boldly they interceded on his behalf that he might be free of the ANBU and the darkness. They feared more blood-soaked missions would provide nourishment for his growing despair; what they feared most was the strength of Kakashi's patent death wish which lured him closer to an eternal abyss.

But the Sandaime would not have it so.

Three young nose wipes, fresh from the Academy were thrust into Kakashi's charge; shaping new lives, would reignite the spark of life somewhere deep inside him _or so it was hoped._

But Kakashi would not have it so.

His pronouncement of judgment upon them was swift, severe, and succinct. And though Kakashi dismissed them from his sight without another thought, yet no refuge found he for the nightmares which continually plagued him.

Three more charges - brothers in bond and blood; in anger he sent them packing as well. Anger … growing and growling within; his pride smarting from the perceived slight - a respected and feared leader of men, reduced to a baby sitter.

Resentment churned and stirred within – a loss of respect for the system he'd pledged himself to - bitterness for the opportunities denied to wallow in the blood of his enemies, these became his daily diet.

Once more, fate pulled him back from the brink of madness.

Another trio of children and with them an opportunity to make amends for past wrongs committed; the offspring of his sensei, the last heir to the clan of a friend and the daughter of a lowly civilian family who needed help to find her place in a world of shinobi …in them he saw himself as through a glass darkly.

Redemption had come last.

Alas and alack, _fate,_ that cruelest bitch - she snatched them from him, cackling with glee as one by one, they left his side. Pain he had not known or dared reveal in their presence dug deep, enlarging the hole in his heart where the three lights once shone.

Darkness set watch to claim him yet again.

Influential ghosts of the past - Obito...Sensei…Rin - no dream nor nightmare were they– from the other side they compelled him to keep his heart open that light might shine there again. Father … his actions finally understood and forgiveness, a long time in coming … extended in meekness and thanks received with gratitude.

Ah, but the darkness, his constant companion made a comeback and so too did a long ago friend.

A friend he'd rescued from a living hell, one who grew into a trusted mentee and who now became his savior – Tenzou. He walked beside him in the light of day, reminding Kakashi that each day held promise of a new beginning. A steadfast diet of loyalty, respect and trust gave Kakashi strength, encouraged him to allow another light to reside in his heart - and at last, darkness he crushed under the heel of his boot.

And then, Tenzou was gone too.

Though he thought he'd never live to see the day … the three lights returned, each of them shining brighter … all of them stood before his eyes, beacons of hope to a new generation. Words spoken from his heart so long ago, became compasses, guiding the three lights through their journeys which led them back to his side.

Tenzou, whose loss he'd mourned also returned … a parting gift from the fates.

The wounds life and its circumstances inflicted, time with its mercies now healed – he stood in an office neither wished nor hoped for. Carrying the hopes and dreams of the entire village upon shoulders made broad by experience, trial and error,

he is the myth,

the legend,

the man,

Hatake Kakashi.


End file.
